Twisted Faerie Tale

Genre: Fairy Tale – Twisty

A young woman finds herself in a car accident and is suddenly in a strange black space of nothing. A weird short little woman appears out of glittery nothing claiming to be her Fairy God Mother and asking the woman what she wishes for. The woman says, what all girls wish for… but questions where she is and what’s going on! Fairy God Mother explains that the young woman is now DEAD in her previous world, and now she is to be reborn elsewhere… but since Fairy God Mother is there, instead she will grant the young woman’s deepest wish and give her a fairy tale life!

The young woman says that’s not really what she’d wish for and she wants to return to her life, but Fairy God Mother says it’s too late, because young woman has already signed the contract with blood! Somehow there is a book in the woman’s hands and her finger is pricked on one of the book’s spiked decorations!

Fairy God Mother waves her magic wand and poof…!

Young woman wakes up in a forest being prodded by dwarves. (Typical fantasy style dwarves.) They don’t believe her story about a Fairy God Mother (fairies don’t look like she described, nor are they that powerful!) And think she is a spy, so they take her off to their prison in their mountain tribe. There she meets a grisly looking man, who has bizarre habits… Both the woman and the grisly man are taken to the Dwarf King for Trial.. who dubs them guilty and sends them to be eaten by the dragon of the Mountain.

The grisly man addresses the dragon as Petunia (which shocks and surprises everyone), as they are old aquaintences. Petunia sends them away as the Woman “Reeks of Destiny” and complains at the Dwarves, as she wants cow meat, not stringy humans… Man, drags woman away… not bothering to explain where they are going.. when they are attacked by bandits! A thief elf and a bard! Man tells the two there is no sense in robbing them, seeing as he’s not gotten his reward money from turning in the Missing Heir… (Where the Woman is now more confused than ever, and the Bandits insist on joining the Man in the quest for a cut of the money!)

Woman threatens to bail! Man explains she is obviously the missing Heir, and blessed by a great destiny (especially after that story of her Fairy God Mother). She is destined to marry some Blond Handsome Prince, Defeat Great Evil, and other very outlandish things, that all of them snicker about, but nonetheless must be true because it’s written in the myth and legends.

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